Ups & Downs

"All that I've found through the Ups & the Downs is that I'd have it no other way," is the beginning of a song that has pretty much tackled my day. The song, originally written by Kendal Payne made me stop in my mental tracks today. At the gym I tend to skip over songs that don't support my adrenaline rush, such as this one. But this morning, while I pumped my legs and sweated profusely I began to focus on the lyrics. And honestly, it's quite true. There are so many things that can pull me in so many different directions all day long; some throw me up, some crush me down, and others just blow me away. "Life in the raw is both fragile and strong, it's both lovely and ugly the same." At night when I open my bible or bow my head to pray it doesn't make a difference what disappointed me, or what seemingly innocent celebration came with a finely printed price tag. "Who can attest for when their at their best all their worst is still crouching close behind." I think living is the conscious act of allowing the reality to wash over me, both good and bad finding their places in the tetris of my life. "It's coming to peace with a darkness in me that allows the true light inside to shine." In the end God reminds me that it's just not worth the effort to worry. "So let it go we are still far from home, if you try and you try to escape." I don't think Kendal Payne was the first or will ever be the last to say it, but in the middle of my routine exercises I found these words to be startlingly true. "To live and to love will always be dangerous but it's better than playing it safe."