Good Neighbor Day

Sometimes I feel like a hollow shell of myself. Like my words and actions are bigger than I really am. I have all these pictures of me posing as an artist; I have my music page and all that ness... lyrics and Cd's; but mostly when I look at that stuff I feel much smaller and quite 'other', if you know what I mean.

Today was Good Neighbor Day in Downingtown. Basically it's a fair set up for the 4th of July and for once my family participated with a booth. Since we did it all with family friends I was selected to watch this and guard that whilst the business of fair making ensued.
I always wanted to be a street performer. In less than a week I've had two opportunities to jam openly for passersby; Just this past Sunday and then today. So after a while of dilly dallying my guitar trickled over from my car. Not long after that I was asked to play louder so my amp found a plug. Luckily I had an old mic in my moms car (and a mic stand, what luck!) and started Jammin! At first I was tentative to sing my songs. They are all Christian! And I just kept thinking "Jonah, Jonah, Jonah. Don't be ashamed of who you are." And then it was just another jam time. So great, until the rain started. I actually sold one CD. That and someone put dollars in my open case. hahaha cool beans.
After the rain shut me down I heard the tune up of a live band down at the main stage of the park. It just so happened that as I was packing up to go home when that same band took a cigarette break right behind Pedro. GOODNESS! So, (the inquisitive person that I am) I went to meet them. One word led to another and they invited me on stage!!!!!! HOORAH! So I jammed guys! 4 songs and a little back ground sax/drums later I floated off the stage. So HAPPY that I got to play for a full crowd of people/passersby. Beautiful

So I'm sure He knew of my sprouting and flourishing feelings of inadequacy blooming in my heart. And today, by letting me jam and play so freely (His music by the way) with such trained musicians, He let me know that YES, I am still so so small. But the good news is I'm still clay. And one day, by His grace, I will fill that very big mold He has set my heart to. Until then I will jam for random passersby and church folk alike.